Finally HOT!

Today the man from Lowe's delivered and installed our new hot water heater. Boy, it sure feels good to have hot water again. It is funny how you take it for granted. I have to admit that I have already gotten into a routine of boiling water for dishes, to wash my hair in the kitchen sink( like I did as a small child) and all. It was not all that bad, except not being able to take a shower.
The worst part was today when I walked the track at MJC with my friend for a hour. I was hot and sweaty when I returned home. Nothing to do but change all my clothes and wipe up with baby wipes.( what a wonderful invention)
I thought about how you never hear people talking about their beloved hot water heaters. They are so faithful that the subject is boring. Who drained their hot water heater every 12 months anyway? No one I know. They have national hot dog day and national yoyo day, but who ever heard of national drain your hot water heater day??? We are making labor day our "drain day" each year. Join me if you like. Maybe we can start a whole new movement. Of course the hot water heater manufacturers will object since I will mean less sales!
Back to the topic of boring. Other words are monotonous,humdrum, trite, etc. That is how most of us feel about having hot water. It is also how most of us feel about God's faithfulness. He gives us sunlight each day, but do we stop to thank him? No way, we are bored. He gives that seasons with boring regularity. What else can you think of?
Now, stop taking that item for granted and thank God for his faithfulness in providing that. Like I will for hot water, until it become humdrum again.

What I am learning

Well, to make the last week complete, today the phone went out. So let's tally up the crazy things:
1. Shingles
2.Mr Tumnus dies
3.Hot water dies
4.Phone stops working
We are still without hot water, though Lowe's is to deliver a new heater tomorrow. I am getting used to heating water to wash the dishes, or as the English say, for washing up. Think of the electricity I am saving! Bathing, well, suffice it to say that we have not repeated the bathtub fiasco. We are joining the French in the once a week bath I guess!
As we pondered the frustration at lunch, we asked God to give us perspective. Jon said," Well, if the hurricane survivors could do it, we sure can. We are not that inconvenienced, really."
Paul said it this way as he rotted in jail:
" I have learned in whatever circumstance to be content. Whether well fed or hungry whether in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Christ who gives me the strength."
So if I learn to be content through this, it is well worth it.

My body

I had a pity party today. I am so sorry that you were not there. Actually you are lucky. It was very boring and even I had to leave after awhile. I was feeling envious of those with healthy bodies and bemoaning my sick one.
But God gave me a reality check. A young gal in our church was shot in the back recently and left paralyzed from the waist down. We have been praying for her as a congregation. Today she had a pass to leave the hospital for the weekend and was at church. We were able to see her and hear from her and pray for her. Boy did that hit me ! I can walk and take care of myself so what have I been whining about???
The sermon was so timely- about the new heaven and new earth. One of the bonuses is a new body. No more pain, no paralysis, just a healthy body for eternity. I can hardly wait.

No good very bad week

Like Alexander, I had a hard week. At least he only had a bad day.
Three major things came our way-
Our hot water heater died
Our Beta, Mr. Tumnus, died
I developed Shingles and not the kind on my roof but on my body.
The hot water heater disaster brought out gales of laughter today as Jon heated water and poured it in the tub for me. As a true gentleman , he would bath second. Just like pioneer days I remarked. In the process I coined a new song, destined for the top ten I am sure:
Home, Home on the range
Where we heat the water for baths
And seldom is heard
any words at all
caus our teeth are chattering.
Rest in peace Mr. Tumnus. You were a good friend and I will miss your face pressed against the glass begging for food.
About shingles- there is nothing funny to say. Well, perhaps the doctor asking if I had been under stress lately was funny!!!! He did not have time to hear it all so I just said, 'YES!' Unlike chicken pox, the bumps are not the worst part. The worst part is pain that runs out from each bump, along the nerve line.
As I pondered the week, looking for a sparkle,this verse came to me:
'This poor woman cried out and the Lord heard her and saved her out of all her troubles.' So I continue to cry out and wait for his deliverance.

All night

The night before last was not one of our best. Jon came home with lots of pain- foot, leg hip, etc. He was also feeling tired and wondering if he could make it another school year. Just as he opened the garage door to come in, Buddy threw up on the floor just inside the door. UGH!!!
I quickly wiped it up and then he could step in. We went through our nightly routines and finally settled in bed. But no sleep. Jon was just too uncomfortable. So we listened to a book on CD for awhile.
At 2:00 Buddy woke up sounding like he was going to vomit again so I rushed him outside. He settled down and begged to come back in. We went back to sleep, or I did.
3:00 AM Jon was up in pain and Buddy threw up before I could get him out. Double UGH.
Somehow we all crashed after that and even slept later than usual.
When I took Buddy out for his early walk ,I faced a shock- the garage door was up and had been all night! And would you know- NOTHING was missing! I could hardly wait to tell Jon that some angel had had garage detail all night, guarding our stuff, including our son in law's table saw!
All day
All night
Angels watching over you my Lord
King David weighed in this way:
He will give his angels charge over you to keep you in all your ways. Psalm 91
Sleep tight tonight

Orphan

I am an orphan, deprived of my parents and now my only sibling. What a lonely feeling. In between dealing with my health and my ongoing issue of worrying instead of trusting God, I have been making brief forays into more grief work. And work it is. My default in this area is denial. Shove the reality of death in a closet and lock the door so it can't get out. But mine is too full of other losses so I guess I will have to continue dealing with it, a little at a time.
All this orphan stuff was triggered by a song I heard today. I find I am emotionally sensitive to messages in song.
Now to the song:
The only words I got were:
There are no strangers
no outcasts
no orphans of God.
What a relief. God is El Olam- God Eternal! He will never leave me by death or otherwise.

Treasures

In the midst of life's hard places, we tend to despair. But in the rubble, God has placed buried treasure. It is our job to unearth it. I was reflecting on that thought and some of the rocky roads that our family has been down together. God took my mind to the late 80's and early 90's and showed me three very priceless treasures from that time period. My treasures have names- Vincent, Micah and Gabriel. Birthed in pain in more than one way but the joy of their grandparents. Each a breathtaking work of art,unique and high valued.
I guess I need to look at the last few weeks and ask God to show me the treasures he has buried there, waiting to be discovered.

Fear

I am still working on 'worry'. Not perfecting it but deleting it as the default of my mind. I read this quote that speaks for itself, though I have to think about it for a bit.
'Fear is faith in the devil.' Bill Johnson, Pastor

A Buddy story

The other day I was walking Buddy toward the park. You may recall he has this teeny little problem of leash aggression. Anyway, I was walking and thinking of the day before when there was another dog at the park, unleashed and running toward us. We had to take off running with Buddy barking and trying to drag me back. We did make it safely home, that day.
Well this next day, as I was walking toward the park, I felt this fear come over me, this voice really, saying,
"You probably will run into that dog again and this time will not be able to control the situation. It will be too much for you".
At first, I was going to turn around and head home, though I knew Buddy NEEDED to go to the park.
Then I heard the Lord ask
" Are you going to walk by fear or faith?"
That stopped me in my tracks ,so to speak.
I remembered Carmen saying,
" Fear expects the worst to happen, faith expects the best to happen."
I was expecting the worst and thus walking by fear.
So I made a decision , held my head high and proceeded to the park.
It was an uneventful walk but a powerful lesson about who to listen to.
The next day I read this quote:

We should only fear is the Lord were not in control
We should worry only if the Lord were not able to meet our needs.
We should strive only if the Lord were not leading us.
We should doubt only if the Lord were not faithful.
We should be discouraged only if the Lord were not alive.

That requires some chewing and then action.

Heart Beat

The other day I had an echocardiogram. It is a sonogram of the heart with Doppler sound waves. It checks the walls and valves of the heart, something that was not done in the hospital last week. You can hear your heart beating as the test proceeds
All of a sudden it hit me that someday my heart will stop beating. I know, I should have thought of that before, but I am slow ,I guess.
Just as quickly I heard the Lord say
"When your heart stops beating, you will not need it any more for you will have entered eternity with me in your new body."
That immediately removed the fear that was attempting to well up in me.
I can face tomorrow for I KNOW Who holds my hand. I no longer need to fear my heart.

I'll Love you forever

Deb's response to my post yesterday brought back a favorite book. When she and her sister were adults we gave them each that children's book and even sang the song in it to them.
I repeat it here with nostalgia.

I'll love you forever
I'll like you for all time
As long as I'm living
You're Mommy I'll be.

The Mom starts singing this to her son at a tender age and even after the boy leaves home, she drives to his house, climbs in the window( on a ladder) and sings it to him while he sleeps.
The last page is the Mom old and tired and the boy rocking her singing to her of his love.
As I pondered that anew today, I thought about the phrase :
'As long as I am living.'
Recent events remind me that that day will come when I AM no longer living.( Actually I had a light bulb event yesterday regarding that, but that is another story). I am mortal- with a beginning and end.
Ah, but I know One, the only One who is not. One of His names is El Olam - God Eternal. We say,' His love endures forever'. And it does. When I am gone the memory of my love will be there for my children, but God will never die so the very presence of His love will endure forever.
What a soft pillow for a grieving soul.

This and that

How time flies .
Grief work in so time consuming, including the scattering of my brother's ashes-which was like having the funeral all over again.
Heat to set records- 110+ for almost 2 weeks. UGH! It saps all your energy and motivation- or it did mine.
Then last week I ended up in ER and an overnight stay in the hospital. That was the same day my dear Sister by love had major surgery. If only we had been in the same hospital we could have encouraged each other face to face. We were both glad that prayer meant we could send love and hugs via God to each other. Not being able to email her seemed so hard since I can't email my brother now either. I will be glad when she can sit to write me again about her day.
The thing that sent me to the hospital was the same thing that my brother ignored- chest pain. It was increasing and more persistent and I could not ignore it. Oh how I wish he had not done so.
The diagnosis?
Healthy heart( how could they miss the broken part of my heart?)
So now we pursue GERD, my pancreas and anxiety( How could that be?)
My husband's kidding diagnosis:
Not wanting to let my 'sister' get all the attention. HA!
I know it was a hard day for Jon and feel sad that he had to face it alone.
Ruth felt sad I spent the night alone, by choice, since I knew the girls had jobs, etc and it was not life threatening. Besides, Jon had to get home to Buddy who missed me, I guess.
It was not a restful night, that is for sure, but God had prepared my heart, just that morning. He gave me a verse to include in a note to my sister in the hospital. Little did I know I would need it that night!
Psalm 28:7
The Lord is my strength and my shield. My HEART trusts in Him and I am helped. My HEART leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.
Through the night watch and the tests the next day, I continued to quote that to myself and felt that peace that passes all understanding. I am so awed at how God gave it to me, before I needed it.
You go GOD!
I do trust you, I am helped and I do sing for joy.